To Heaven With Love Read online

  A vision of another woman – her own Mama on her wedding day, hidden and unrecognisable behind the heavy folds of her veil.

  “Audrey!” she cried, jumping to her feet. “Put the dress on!”

  “No, my Lady, I couldn’t!”

  Audrey stepped back in confusion, her face pink with shock.

  “You must! Please, just try it on!”

  And as Audrey hesitatingly stepped into the wedding dress and slid her arms into the sleeves, she leapt up and ran over to the big trunk, pulling out the veil.

  “What are you doing, my Lady?” she cried, through thick folds of net, as Dorianna pulled off her cap and tossed the veil over her head.

  Her heart was pounding with excitement.

  The young maid was completely invisible behind the wedding veil.

  She was the perfect image of an aristocratic young lady on her wedding day.

  The only sign of anyone beneath the rich flounces of silk and net was a glimpse of golden hair where the veil was fastened – exactly the same colour as Dorianna’s.

  “Audrey – ” whispered Dorianna, lifting the veil so that she could see the maid’s face.

  “Will you take my place in the Chapel tomorrow?”

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  “What are you saying, my Lady?” gasped Audrey, brushing the veil aside.

  Her eyes were wide with instant shock, and she was trembling so much that the rich satin of the wedding gown shimmered like a white waterfall all around her.

  “I cannot marry Lord Buxton!”

  She clutched at Dorianna’s wrists in terror and her hands felt so rough and chapped, making her think of how hard she must have worked for most of her young life.

  “No, Audrey, of course you can’t! That is not what I mean at all.”

  “Then, whatever are you saying?” cried Audrey, as tears trickled down her face. “I don’t understand! Are you making fun of me?”

  “No, no! Not at all! Let me tell you just what I am thinking.”

  Dorianna led Audrey over so they could sit side-by- side on the four-poster bed.

  “I cannot go through with this wedding,” she said and as soon as the words were spoken, she felt her heart grow lighter.

  “I cannot marry this man, Lord Buxton.”

  Audrey looked at her, her blue eyes swimming with tears.

  “Oh, my poor Lady,” she breathed.

  “I have never known love,” Dorianna went on, her voice unsteady, “but I do know that you have and I can see when you speak of your Joshua that you love him deeply and that he is the only one for you.”

  “That’s right, my Lady.”

  Audrey brushed the tears from her cheeks. She was looking calmer now.

  “I will never marry another, if I cannot have him.”

  “Somewhere, Audrey, there must be someone like him for me, don’t you think?” Dorianna asked, her heart beating fast.

  “Yes, my Lady! There will be, and you will know, as soon as you find him, that he is your true love and you are his.”

  “So that is exactly why I cannot marry Lord Buxton tomorrow.”

  She took a deep breath, trying not to feel afraid as she thought of what she was about to embark on.

  “I am going to run away, Audrey. I know that it’s a terrible thing to do, but it is the only way.”

  “Where would you go?” Audrey twisted her hands together nervously. “What will you do?”

  “I just don’t know, but anything will be better than being trapped in a marriage with a man I do not love.”

  “I would do anything to help you, my Lady, but – ”

  Audrey looked very frightened and Dorianna took her hand and held it tightly.

  “I cannot do it without you. If you will put on this wedding dress and the veil tomorrow and go to the Chapel in my place, that will give me enough time to get away, for everyone will believe that the ceremony is going ahead as planned and no one will know I have gone.”

  “But – but – ”

  Audrey was now shaking with terror.

  “And as you arrive at the altar and the Vicar asks if anyone has any objection to the marriage, you raise the veil and show your face to reveal your true identity.”

  “But, my Lady – what will become of me? They will throw me in prison for impersonating you!”

  Audrey jumped to her feet and pulled her arms out of the sleeves of the wedding gown, letting it fall to the floor in a cascade of gleaming satin.

  “Audrey, you must tell them that I forced you to do it. You are my maid, you can tell them that I beat you and threatened you – anything you like!”

  “Even if they believe me, my Lady, I will lose my job. They will throw me out without a reference and how will I ever find another place to work? And then Josh and I will never marry, for how will I earn any money?”

  Audrey was clearly deeply distressed and Dorianna then felt ashamed of herself for not thinking more carefully about the consequences of her plan.

  She went over to the trunk that contained her night things and found the envelope with Mr. Bentley’s money.

  “Audrey, I am so sorry, I have not been thoughtful of you. Of course, I am asking you to do something which is risky and will certainly mean you will lose your job.”

  “I do really want to help you, but it will be the end of everything – ” murmured Audrey, looking as if she was about to cry again.

  “If it meant that you could marry Joshua right away, instead of waiting for two years, would you do it for me?”

  “Yes – yes – I suppose I would.”

  Audrey still looked apprehensive.

  “Because I may be able to help you do so. I don’t know how much money you might save in a year – ”

  “Why, Lady Buxton pays us twenty-five pounds – and I spend as little as I can.”

  “Then look – take this – ”

  Dorianna counted out twenty of the notes that Mr. Bentley had given her.

  “Will that be enough for you and Joshua to set up home, right away?”

  Audrey’s face turned scarlet as she took the notes from Dorianna.

  “A hundred pounds! But this is a vast fortune,” she breathed. “It is ever so much more than enough.”

  “Will you do it for me, Audrey? Could you?”

  Dorianna’s heart was beating faster and faster and she thought that she might choke.

  The maid turned the money over in her work-worn hands, staring at it as if she did not believe it was real.

  Then she looked up at Dorianna, her blue eyes shining.

  “I will, my Lady.”

  She pressed the notes to her heart.

  “I don’t know how I shall be able to walk down the aisle to stand in front of all those people and reveal myself, but if it means that Josh and I can be together, then I’ll do it!”

  Dorianna felt a pang of envy as she saw the joy and happiness glowing on Audrey’s face.

  ‘Whatever must it be like,’ she thought to herself, ‘to love someone as much as she loves Josh?’

  “But, my Lady,” Audrey was saying, “you cannot give me so much money – what will you do for yourself?”

  “I have some left over. An old family friend gave me a generous gift when he heard I was to be married. He said – it was a good thing for a woman to have a little bit of independence.”

  What would he have thought if he had known just how much independence she was going to have! That she might be entirely alone in the world, a fugitive, in hiding from all who knew her!

  “Are you all right, my Lady?”

  Now frantic panic rose in Dorianna’s heart and she clutched her head in both hands as she tried to come to terms with what she was about to do.

  “What will happen to me, Audrey? How will I get away? What if they come after me and find me?”

  Audrey frowned.

  “You must go tonight, as that will give you a good start. The moon is still almost full, so you will be able to see your way ahead.”
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  “But I don’t even know the countryside around here – how will I know where I am going?” Dorianna pleaded, all her courage and excitement draining away, leaving her limbs feeling weak and shivery.

  “I don’t believe I can do it – ”

  Audrey put her arms around her for a moment and gave her a hug.

  Then she jumped up from the bed and hurried to the door, stepping over the fallen wedding gown.

  “If you wait here, my Lady, I have had an idea.”

  “Where are you going?” cried Dorianna, suddenly afraid to be left on her own.

  “I am going to speak to my uncle, my Lady. He’s a kind man with a good heart and he may help you.”

  “No, Audrey! How do you know that you can trust him? What if he betrays me and tells Lord Buxton I am planning to run away?”

  “I don’t believe he would ever do that.”

  “I don’t even know your uncle, so why should he help me?”

  “But then you do know him, my Lady! You met him today. He’s Mr. Jackson, the horse dealer.”

  Dorianna caught her breath in surprise.

  So the kindly man with the beard is Audrey’s uncle.

  She had liked him intuitively, even though he was a horse dealer, as he had been so gentle and quiet with Lady Atalanta, the nervous thoroughbred mare.

  “Let me at least speak to him,” Audrey was saying, “as if he cannot help, I am sure he will keep silent about your plan and I fear you will soon be caught if you try to escape on your own.”

  “All right,” agreed Dorianna and Audrey ran out of the bedroom, hastily fastening her apron and pinning her white cap back onto her head.

  Once on her own Dorianna rummaged through her trunks, pulling out a dark woollen dress and a pair of stout boots to keep her warm on her journey into the unknown.

  She quickly packed up a carpetbag with a few other clothes, including the pink dress with the vine leaf pattern her dear Papa had given her long ago. It was old now, but she loved it and it was almost the only thing she possessed that had not been given to her by Lord Buxton.

  She was just fastening the carpetbag when Audrey returned red in the face.

  “He says he will do it, my Lady!” she cried, panting for breath. “I told him that you could not go through with the wedding and that you had to run away. But you really must leave at once!”

  “I am ready,” replied Dorianna and asked Audrey to help her put on the blue dress and lace up her boots.

  “Why, you are freezing cold!” remarked Audrey, as she touched Dorianna’s hand. “Are you afraid?”

  “I am terrified. But I have to go, I cannot stay and be married to Lord Buxton.”

  “I am frightened, too,” admitted Audrey. “I cannot bear to think of the moment tomorrow when they see that it is me standing in front of the altar and not you!”

  “Remember what I said,” Dorianna told her, “you must pretend that it is all my fault and that I forced you.

  “They will be angry, but they will believe you, I am sure. They will throw you out of the house, but you have the money and you can go straight to Josh and tell him that you can be married!”

  Audrey smiled at her, her eyes lighting up again at the thought of the man she loved.

  Then she said,

  “My Lady, we are forgetting something! I have to get dressed for the wedding and I have no one to help me!”

  Dorianna laughed.

  “I will do it for you, but you will have to wear your wedding finery all through the night!”

  “I would never sleep a wink anyway, as I’ll be so nervous and when I’m not feeling afraid, I’ll be thinking about Josh and how happy he’ll be when he sees me.”

  Dorianna then helped her into the wedding gown, this time fastening all the hooks at the back carefully.

  “You will have to sit very still all night,” she said, “or you will look all crumpled when you go to the Chapel. Shall I fix the veil for you?”

  “No, I can do that myself. But what about the shoes?”

  She slid the white satin shoes onto Audrey’s feet.

  “Ouch, they are a tight fit! I will have a job not to limp into the Chapel!”

  “Sit on the sofa and put your feet up, you have been on your feet all day, so once you have rested them well, the shoes will be much more comfortable.”

  “Thank you, I had not thought of that. I am just not used to sitting like a Lady,” said Audrey, lowering herself carefully onto the sofa so as not to crease the white satin.

  “You must go now, my Lady, I can’t believe that I may never see you again.”

  The two girls looked at each other for a while, each feeling fearful of what was to come and each knowing that life would now never be the same for either of them.

  “Good luck, Audrey, I cannot thank you enough for what you are doing for me.”

  She went over to the trunk that contained her night clothes and pulled out the nightgown with lace butterflies.

  “Take this for your trousseau. I am sure that no one will miss it, and it is so fine and delicate that you can easily hide it in your bag.”

  “Oh, it’s so beautiful! Thank you, I never thought I should have such a thing for myself. But you must go! You will find my uncle at the entrance to the stable yard – he’ll be waiting for you.”

  Dorianna grabbed the carpetbag and ran to the door.

  She then looked back at Audrey, sitting on the sofa in the wedding gown and it was just as if she was leaving the ghost of herself behind.

  “Goodbye, Audrey. Good luck and be happy!” she called out and then closed the door behind her as she took her first steps to freedom.

  *

  Dorianna crept silently over to the archway that led into the stable yard.

  It was pitch-dark in the shadows and she could see nothing.

  Then, over the pounding of her heart, she heard the scraping of a horse’s shoe on the cobblestones and a man’s voice called softly,

  “Hello, there!”

  It was Mr. Jackson.

  The outline of his cap was just visible in the faint light coming from a flickering lamp burning over the door to the tack room.

  He came forward to greet Dorianna and to take the heavy carpetbag from her.

  “Did you see anyone as you left?” he muttered.

  “No, there was no one about. Thank you so much, Mr. Jackson, for helping me.”

  She struggled to keep her voice from trembling.

  “Don’t thank me yet. We have a long way to go before we are safe. I have told the grooms I have business at my yard tomorrow morning, so I am setting out tonight. They will not be surprised when they hear us leave.”

  “Where will you take me, Mr. Jackson? I must get as far away as I possibly can, as once they find out at the wedding that I am not there, they will certainly come after me.”

  Her whole being was just aching to be on the move, and leave the forbidding walls of Rouston Hall behind her.

  “I’ll take you to the coast,” Mr. Jackson suggested, “as I think you would be best heading for the Continent, if you don’t want them to find you.”

  “Yes, yes, that will be wonderful,” cried Dorianna, her mind spinning at the thought.

  The Continent!

  She had never been abroad. What would it be like? How would she survive?

  ‘I can speak a little French and a little Italian,’ she comforted herself. ‘All will be well. And at least I will be safe there, as no one will know who I am.’

  “Let’s go at once and thank you so very much, Mr. Jackson, for what you are doing.”

  Now that her eyes were more used to the dark, she could see the bulky square shape of his horsebox, waiting under the archway with two shire horses standing patiently in front of it.

  Suddenly a worrying thought struck Dorianna.

  “Mr. Jackson, if we are caught, you will be in great trouble. I am so very desperate to get away that I had not thought of that.”

  Mr. Jack
son grunted.

  “I’m not a gambling man, my Lady, but I do enjoy beating the odds and taking a little risk now and then. I think we will get away with it!”

  He led Dorianna to a small door at the side of the horsebox and opened it up.

  “Climb inside, my Lady. I have put clean straw in, and if anyone does stop us – why, I will tell them you are a stowaway and that you crept in without me knowing.”

  “Oh, how clever of you! I couldn’t bear it if you should be blamed for my escape,” whispered Dorianna, as she climbed up into the horsebox.

  The straw rustled around her ankles and there was a strong smell of hay and horses.

  “You had best be sitting down when we leave, my Lady,” Mr. Jackson was saying, “as the old box does roll around a bit on the road,”

  He closed the door, leaving Dorianna completely in the dark.

  She sat down on a pile of the crisp clean straw.

  Faintly through the walls of the box she heard Mr. Jackson click his teeth, and then there was a rumbling of wheels over cobblestones and the vehicle began to sway.

  They were on their way!

  Dorianna sat still in the dark hugging her knees and thinking how strange it was that the last occupant of this horsebox was a racehorse – the lovely grey mare, Lady Atalanta.

  ‘I wonder how she felt on her journey, poor thing! Did she ever wonder where she was going and if she would be well cared for when she arrived?’ thought Dorianna.

  ‘At least it is my choice to be here now and I have a chance of freedom and happiness at the other end.’

  The horsebox trundled over the stony road, rocking like a rowing boat and she found herself yawning deeply.

  She lay down in the straw that made a comfortable if somewhat prickly bed and fell into an exhausted sleep.

  *

  All was very still and quiet when she awoke. Soft pearly daylight was shining in through the open back door of the horsebox.

  Dorianna felt shivery and for a moment she could not recall where she was and then she saw her woollen dress covered in pieces of straw.

  “Quick now, my Lady, the sun is up and we must keep going!”

  Mr. Jackson leaned in through the door, a thick scarf was around his neck and a long carriage whip in his hand.

  Dorianna sat up.