Touching the Stars Read online

  “Shall we sit here?” he suggested.

  Her large grey eyes looked pleased.

  “May I introduce Mr. Wright, my Lord? He is a member of the Indian Civil Service.”

  “Delighted to meet you, Mr. Wright. I shall be having many meetings with the ICS during the next few months.”

  He sat down beside Justina, opposite the civil servant.

  “How is your wife? Feeling any better?” asked Justina. “I think the motion of the ship has eased a little during the morning.”

  “Not enough,” he replied ruefully. He polished off a piece of steamed pudding and rose. “I must go and see how she is, though I doubt I’ll get more than a few whispered words of wishing for death from her. I trust you will enjoy your meal, it is a pleasure to see a young lady with such fine sea legs.”

  They watched him walk away.

  Lord Castleton asked if Justina would like some wine and was amused to see her wrinkling her nose as she debated with herself over whether to accept his offer.

  “It’s very kind of you, my Lord, but I think my father would say alcohol should be restricted to the evenings. But, please,” she added hastily, “do have some yourself.”

  “I will,” he assured her and ordered a bottle of claret.

  “I find I am very hungry,” Justina confided in him. “But perhaps that is unladylike to confess.”

  “Does it worry you to be thought unladylike?” he enquired, amused at the unexpected nature of this girl.

  “I am always being told how important it is to comport myself with due decorum,” she said and looked at him through her long eyelashes, a proper picture of demureness.

  “And you find that difficult?”

  Justina sighed heavily.

  “I want to say what I think, so many aspects of life are exciting and interesting, or make me angry. Instead of being able to discuss them with, well, with anyone, I am supposed to make commonplace comments.”

  Any of Lord Castleton’s many friends would have been amazed to see him in conversation with a girl only just ‘out’.

  On the rare occasions he attended balls and dinner parties, he spent most of his time avoiding the attentions of husband-hunting mothers and debutantes.

  The previous evening he had obeyed an impulse to rescue a girl who seemed, despite the style of her inappropriate gown, to be all at sea in every sense.

  When he had been disturbed by the noise in the next door cabin, he had at first hardly recognised her. Gone was the elegant dress, exchanged for clothes more suited to a Second than a First Class passenger. Her flaming hair was drawn back in an unbecoming knot and her rigidly controlled demeanour had given way to unashamed passion – all on behalf of a small dog!

  Once again he had obeyed an impulse. Instead of allowing the Stewards to send for a ship’s Officer, who would have known exactly how to insist the dog was returned to its kennel and would probably have left the girl feeling bruised and resentful, he had taken charge himself.

  What was it about her that caused him to behave in such a reckless fashion?

  “Are you ‘out’?” he asked her.

  Justina gave another great sigh.

  “My aunt, Lady Elder, gave me a Season last year. I am afraid I let her down badly.”

  “In what way did you let her down?” he asked curiously. “I am sure your manners could not be found wanting and you have a remarkable presence.”

  She flushed, disconcerted at his remark.

  “Presence, my Lord? My aunt would say I lacked tact and social graces.” She lent towards him in her engagingly confiding manner. “Perhaps you know how to speak to girls who seem to have no thoughts in their heads beyond eligible men and the latest fashions, as I don’t. And is it my fault if young men prefer blonde curls and simpering misses who never contradict a single thing they say?”

  Lord Castleton laughed.

  “No doubt you told them when they said something less than sensible?”

  Justina grinned at him, perfectly at ease again.

  “They would make the most asinine remarks, such as wasn’t the weather perfect, or didn’t I think the current Royal Academy exhibition such a topping lot of pictures? Most of the time I stood at the side of the dance floor watching other girls look at them as though they were Gods.”

  She gave a most unladylike snort.

  Miss Mansell had a very mobile face and Lord Castleton enjoyed himself watching dismay gradually dawn over it.

  “You see what a wretched grasp of etiquette I have,” she said. “I should be asking you about yourself, why you are going to India, which I would dearly love to hear about, and thanking you again for sorting out poor Muffin instead of telling you how impossible I am.”

  “Are you impossible?”

  “Mama and Papa are expecting me to attract a suitable husband on this visit to my brother. They are worried I shall end an old maid. I used to think that I would like to remain a spinster as that way I could think and say what I liked, but now I wonder if it might not be better to find someone I could love with all my heart. Then I would please Mama and Papa and be happy myself. Would that be impossible, do you think, my Lord?”

  He was taken aback.

  Not at the sentiments, he could understand those all too well, but that she should be expressing them to himself.

  But this girl was simply talking to him as though he was her – damn it, as though he was her uncle! A man of her father’s generation.

  Lord Castleton was in his early thirties and nothing in his life so far had suggested young women could look on him as anything other than desirable husband material.

  Until now!

  He picked up his wine glass and drank deeply.

  Justina was looking at him anxiously. She obviously expected a sincere response.

  “Not at all impossible, Miss Mansell,” he said quietly. “I was fortunate enough to enjoy a most loving relationship until death took my beloved Ariadne from me.”

  “What a tragedy,” Justina sighed. She put a slim hand on his arm. “I feel so much for you.”

  He swallowed hard and cleared his throat.

  “Thank you. And I hope that you will find someone you can love as deeply.” He tried for a lighter tone. “I am sure you will meet a wide variety of single men during your time in India. Why not give them a chance to attract you. I am sure they will find you a delightful companion.”

  Then she proved that she had both tact and social skills by enquiring about the reasons for his visit to India.

  He enjoyed telling her how he would be meeting many of the Maharajas.

  The rest of the meal passed very quickly as he held her entranced with tales of bejewelled and autocratic rulers.

  “And you must try and see Jaipur,” he suggested as their dessert plates were removed. “When the Prince of Wales visited there some twenty years ago, the town was painted a fetching shade of ochre and now it is known as the Pink City.”

  “How amazing! Fancy painting a whole town just because a foreign Prince was to pay a visit.”

  “Remember that he will be Emperor of India one day.”

  “I must say, though, that ochre doesn’t sound very pink.”

  “It’s the sun that gives it that special tinge.”

  “Oh, how wonderful it would be to see it at sunset,” Justina clapped her hands, immediately entranced with the vision. “I must ask Peter if he can organise a visit.”

  Lord Castleton wanted to say that he would arrange it for her, but restrained himself.

  “It is still raining and the motion of the ship is keeping most passengers in their cabins. Would you like to play some cards? Simple games,” he added hastily. “I do not mean we should gamble.”

  Justina gave him one of her delightful grins.

  “Vicky and I often play a sort of double-handed patience. I wonder if you know it?”

  “You can show me and I am sure you can teach me quite quickly.”

  Justina could hardly believe that her
e she was playing cards with Lord Castleton. She in fact spent several hours with him in an atmosphere of great amiability. It was almost as though he was one of the family.

  It was no doubt wrong of her to tell him all about her worries over finding a suitable husband, but he had not seemed to mind.

  With a cry of triumph, Justina won the latest of their games. She glanced delightedly up at Lord Castleton and caught him looking at her with a warm smile.

  All of a sudden, deep within her, she felt her heart stop and it was if the world halted in its motion.

  Moments later her heart thumped back with a strange beat, the world continued its spinning and her breath returned.

  But it was as if a layer of her skin had been removed, leaving her ultra-sensitive to the man sitting on the other side of the table. She was conscious of every breath he drew, every movement he made.

  Justina gathered up the cards with trembling hands. She tried to shuffle them, but she had no control and they spilled everywhere.

  Lord Castleton did not seem to notice anything strange. His attention was caught by someone who had just entered the Lounge.

  “Well, well,” said Sir Thomas. “I see you are having fun. Can I join your little party?”

  Without waiting for an invitation, he brought a chair up to their table, sat down and started to help Justina gather together the cards.

  His presence helped her regain some sort of control.

  In one way she was pleased that Sir Thomas had arrived, but in another she resented him intruding on the happy time she had been enjoying with Lord Castleton.

  “What is the game?” enquired Sir Thomas, shuffling the pack expertly.

  Lord Castleton rose.

  “I am afraid I have to return to my papers,” he said and Justina could not understand why his voice was suddenly so cold.

  “Have I said something?” Sir Thomas asked in a jovial voice.

  “Not at all. It is unfortunate I have had to bring so much work with me. Miss Mansell, thank you for your company.”

  He gave Justina a small stiff bow and left the Lounge.

  She felt abandoned.

  Before Sir Thomas arrived, they had been friends, now it was as though he had been undertaking some kind of duty in being with her, a duty that the arrival of the other man had removed from him.

  “I have to apologise for my clothes, Sir Thomas. As you can see, I have not been able to change.”

  He raised an eyebrow.

  “You still look enchanting to me, but what prevented you?”

  “There was some trouble with Mrs. Arbuthnot’s dog. Lord Castleton helped sort things out. We were very late for lunch.”

  “Castleton helped you?”

  “He was very kind.”

  Sir Thomas ran a thumb over the edge of the cards in a way that Justina found irritating.

  She suddenly felt drained. It had been an exhausting day. Coping with the motion of the ship was tiring. The difficulties with Muffin had caused her a great deal of stress.

  Then there was that heart-stopping moment with Lord Castleton that she could not understand, or why when he left so abruptly she should feel so lost.

  And now there was Sir Thomas. She enjoyed the way he made her feel attractive, but he raised tensions in her that, again, she did not understand.

  “I am so sorry,” she said, rising. “I am afraid I must have a rest. The ship rocks so much.”

  He looked up and she saw that he was angry.

  “I understand, but you are not tired enough to play cards with Lord Castleton,” he gave the title a derisive emphasis.

  “But when I come along, suddenly you have to go and rest,” he mimicked a mincing way of speaking that Justina did not feel resembled at all her straight-forward delivery. “Well, let me tell you that there is little to admire about Lord Castleton.”

  “What – what do you mean?”

  Sir Thomas looked at her, his dark eyes serious.

  “Perhaps I should not have spoken as I did, but I knew the late Lady Castleton very well – poor woman.”

  “Why do you say, ‘poor woman’ like that?”

  “Because she was to be pitied, married to Castleton with his proud airs and political ambitions. She found life, shall we say, unsatisfactory.”

  Justina could not take in what he was saying.

  “Ariadne was a beautiful woman, she could have had any number of men. She must have regretted her choice many a time, left on her own while Castleton danced attendance on his political masters, always at the House of Lords or in Whitehall instead of accompanying her to dinner or spending time at their country estate.”

  Sir Thomas gave a bark of a laugh.

  “Don’t let that smooth manner fool you, Castleton lacks a heart.”

  “I cannot believe – ” she started to say when he interrupted her with a deprecating laugh.

  “Of course you can’t. You or the rest of the world.” He sighed heavily. “Perhaps I see things differently because I was so fond of Ariadne.”

  He looked so sad that Justina in her impulsive way felt sorry for him. She could not, though, believe that Lord Castleton had been anything but a model husband.

  “But I am keeping you from your rest.” Sir Thomas rose. “I shall look forward to seeing you this evening. Perhaps if Mrs. Arbuthnot and her daughters are still not well, you will join me for dinner?”

  Justina muttered something to the effect that he was very kind and left the Lounge.

  The ship was now pitching and rolling more than ever and, even though she did not feel seasick, she was not sorry to lie on her bed.

  On the other side of the bulkhead was Lord Castleton’s cabin.

  She wanted to go and ask him why he had left their card game so abruptly.

  What had it had to do with the arrival of Sir Thomas?

  Was he going to spend the rest of the voyage working in his cabin? She wanted so much to be able to talk to him again.

  Sir Thomas had asked her to dine with him. The prospect was exciting but unnerving and, even more important, she was sure that her aunt would not approve.

  When Sir Thomas looked at her with his dark eyes, she felt her heart begin to race, but he was a very unsettling companion.

  Was he to be trusted?

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Before dressing for dinner that evening, Justina went to check on Mrs. Arbuthnot and her daughters.

  All were still suffering from dreadful seasickness.

  Blessing the fact that she seemed to be an excellent sailor, she returned to her cabin.

  What was she to do now about this evening?

  It must be wrong to accept Sir Thomas’s invitation to dine with him, but she knew how persuasive he could be.

  And what would Lord Castleton think if he saw her dining with Sir Thomas? Justina was not sure why she was so worried about this prospect but she was.

  Agonising over her quandary, she fought her way along the pitching corridor back to her cabin.

  Just before she reached her door, Lord Castleton came out of his cabin.

  “Miss Mansell,” he acknowledged her formally. “Finished your card game?”

  “I haven’t been playing,” she replied hurriedly. “I had a rest and then went to see how Mrs. Arbuthnot and Faith and Charity were faring.”

  “Still suffering, I would imagine.”

  He sounded so kind and so much the friend she had spent such a large part of the afternoon with, Justina immediately forgot Sir Thomas’s description of him as an unfeeling husband and felt emboldened.

  “Lord Castleton, I have a problem,” she began shyly.

  “Not with Muffin, I hope?” he asked with a warm smile.

  She shook her head.

  “It’s this evening – ”

  Justina forgot about the heart-stopping moment she had felt earlier. She was certain now that this friend of her father’s would be the best person to solve her dilemma.

  “It’s that Sir Thomas who has asked
me to join him for dinner,” she said shyly.

  Lord Castleton’s smile vanished and he stood very still.

  “What have you said to Sir Thomas?”

  “Only that it was kind of him, but I was not sure about this evening and – and then I left.”

  “I see.”

  Justina was about to say that he could not possibly understand the difficulty of her situation when the ship lurched particularly violently and she was pushed into Lord Castleton’s arms.

  He grasped her securely and she felt herself held close to his chest. Her head fitted neatly under his chin and she could feel his heart beating.

  For a moment she imagined that his lips were kissing her hair.

  “I am so sorry,” she blurted out, amazed at the way her heart was beating.

  “Now, what are we going to do about your problem?” he mused as though they had never been clasped in a close embrace.

  Justina gazed at him hopefully.

  “Do you want to dine with Sir Thomas?”

  She shook her head vigorously.

  “I enjoy his company, but I am sure my aunt, Lady Elder, would say it would be very unwise.”

  “I agree with her,” he said composedly. “I also know that Sir Thomas is not a man who takes ‘no’ lightly.”

  “That is why I don’t know what to do. If I have my meal in the cabin, he may well come down to see if I am suffering seasickness.”

  “I think I see a way to avoid any unpleasantness. When you are ready to go to the Saloon this evening, knock at my door and we will go through together.”

  It was a delightful idea, but she felt that Lady Elder would no more approve of her dining with Lord Castleton than she would her dining with Sir Thomas.

  “Trust me,” he said soothingly, stopping her in mid-sentence.

  He smiled at her in a very friendly way. Rather, she thought with an odd feeling of regret, as her father might have done.

  “I promise all will go smoothly, rather more smoothly than this ship at present,” he added as the vessel gave another lurch.

  “Thank you, my Lord,” Justina sighed. She had a wonderful feeling of relief. This was someone who really did understand.

  *

  Lord Castleton checked the time before he slipped his hunter watch into the pocket of his waistcoat and adjusted its thick gold chain across his midriff.