Love by the Lake Page 12
“I cannot understand,” said Lord Seabrook, “how the Earl of Walcott could have parted with his possessions, which were so intimate that they should have been preserved for his children, even if he could not keep the Priory itself.”
“I am sure that was what the Earl wanted,” responded Lolita. “But perhaps fate or rather his poverty was against him. As you must be aware, my Lord, those pictures are today very valuable.”
“I have always understood that the Earl died without having a son, but I would have thought some relation would have come forward and demanded to be allowed to keep just a few of the treasures in the family.”
He spoke almost harshly – it was as if he was accusing him of giving up his heritage without even fighting to preserve it.
“I am sure that was what the Earl wanted to happen, but of course he would not have sold the Priory in the first place if he had not been forced to do so.”
She spoke a little truculently and Lord Seabrook smiled.
“I see you are defending him,” he said, “but at the time by hook or by crook he should have kept some of the pictures at any rate. I noticed that there was one of his daughter when she was very small and even that one was left behind.”
Lolita did not answer and because he had not wished to argue the point, Lord Seabrook changed the subject.
When dinner was over they walked into the drawing room where the chandeliers had been lit.
“Now I can talk to you about whether or not I should buy the Priory,” sighed Lord Seabrook as he sank into a comfortable armchair.
“I have already suggested that you might give it to Simon when he marries, my Lord, but of course by that time you may have a son of your own who will want somewhere to live if you are still alive.”
“Which I hope I shall be, but the difficulty is that to have a son, I have first to be married.”
To his surprise Lolita rose to her feet.
“You must forgive me,” she said, “but I must go to bed. I am very tired and I want to feel at my best when you swim with Simon and me tomorrow morning.”
Lord Seabrook also rose.
“Of course I understand. It has been a long day. Good night, Mrs. Bell, and thank you once again for helping me to enjoy my dinner.”
Lolita smiled at him and then without saying any more and before he could reach the door she had left the room.
Lord Seabrook walked to the window.
The last rays of the sun were crimson on the horizon and the stars were coming out overhead and were reflected in the stillness of the lake below.
It was very beautiful and very romantic.
Suddenly he knew he could not go on any longer.
He wanted Mrs. Bell unbearably.
He could no longer pretend, as he had tried to do, that she meant nothing to him and was just a competent governess for his nephew.
He stood looking at the lake for a long time before he turned and walked from the room and upstairs.
Lolita had torn herself away from him – not because she was tired, but because she had an almost irresistible urge to tell him who she was and to explain why she had been so emotional at seeing the Priory.
How could she bear to allow all those treasures which were so precious to her mother and father to fall into the hands of someone unknown and uninterested, perhaps a common man who was only buying it all because he was rich enough to afford it.
‘They are mine! They are part of me!’ Lolita anguished. ‘I cannot bear them to belong to someone who will not love and cherish them as I could do.’
As she climbed into bed she knew it would be impossible to sleep.
All she wanted to do was to talk to her parents and to ask them to explain to her why she had felt so moved at Walcott Priory and what it had meant to them in their lives.
It had never seemed quite so important as it did now as when they had talked about it, it did not seem real.
Now she had seen it, she had felt the atmosphere which seemed vibrant with the Walcotts all down the centuries.
There were several books beside her bed with she had taken from the library, but she thought it would be almost impossible to concentrate on reading at the moment.
She therefore picked up her Prayer Book which she had brought with her when she had run away. She thought that if she prayed as she had done in the Chapel, she would feel once again as if her father and mother were beside her.
They would tell her what she should do.
Then to her surprise the door which led into the schoolroom opened.
It was ajar in case Simon should call for her in the night and she thought it must be Simon coming in, but to her surprise it was his uncle.
He closed the door behind him and walked down the room towards her.
“What has – happened? What is – wrong?” stammered Lolita. “I didn’t hear – Simon call for me.”
“Simon is fast asleep,” Lord Seabrook assured her. “But I want to talk to you.”
“To talk – to me!” exclaimed Lolita. “But what about – and why here?”
“You left me before I had a chance to tell you what was in my mind,” he replied. “I have thought about it for several nights and I have no wish to go on thinking about it again tonight.”
He had reached the bed and now he sat down on it. “I do not understand,” murmured Lolita.
“It is really quite simple,” said Lord Seabrook with a smile. “I think, although you are very mysterious about it, that you are as lonely as I am. If we share our loneliness then perhaps we can make each other very happy, as I certainly want to make you happy.”
He spoke very quietly, but Lolita’s eyes were still wide with surprise.
She still did not understand.
“You are very lovely,” he added. “So lovely that it would be impossible for any man not to want to make you happy. I think we can find a great deal of happiness and joy together.”
There was a moment’s silence and then as Lolita was still staring at him, he continued,
“I will promise you one thing. You will never again have to earn your own living or be frightened. I will protect and look after you and I will be very generous if in the future we agree to part from each other.”
As he finished speaking, he moved forward as if to put his arms round her.
Lolita pushed herself backwards against the pillows.
“I still do not understand,” she said. “What are you saying to me and what do you want?”
“The answer to that question is quite simple. I want you, my darling. I want you in my arms and I want to teach you about love, the love I have been feeling for you for a long time.”
“It cannot – be true,” whispered Lolita.
“It is true,” he answered, “and as I have already said, I feel sure we will be very happy together.”
He moved a little closer still, but she held herself away from him and when his lips would have found hers, she turned her head away.
“What are you – asking me to do?” she asked.
Then as if it suddenly occurred to her, she gave a little cry.
“You cannot be suggesting – that I should be your – mistress.”
“That is rather a hard word. I love you, Lolo, but I cannot, in my position, ask you to be my wife. Because you are so intelligent I feel you will understand the situation. I will give you anything you want and everything you ask of me.”
Lolita gave a little cry of horror.
“N-no! N-no!” she stuttered. “Of course not!”
“I will not allow you to say that!”
His arms were round her and he pulled her closer.
She managed somehow to twist round so that her hands were holding him away from her.
“No! No!” she repeated. “No, I could not – do such – a thing. Go away. Please go away – I must not listen – to you.”
There was such agony in her voice that Lord Seabrook checked himself.
“Please believe,” he sa
id soothingly, “that I love you as I have never loved any woman before. You must understand why I cannot marry you, but I know I can make you happy, as I shall be happy just because we are together.”
“It would be – wrong – wicked, and it is – something I cannot do. It would shock and – horrify Mama.”
The words seemed to force themselves through Lolita’s lips and although she was almost incoherent, Lord Seabrook could only just hear her.
For a moment he was silent and then he moved a little away from her hands which were still outstretched on his chest.
As he did so he saw the light of the candle glitter on the third finger of her left hand.
He was aware it was her wedding ring.
Then she moved her hand as if she realised there was no longer any need to hold him away from her.
“So you are not married. I suspected it, but there was really no reason to disbelieve you.”
“I thought it would make me seem – older – when I was bringing Simon to you,” muttered Lolita.
“So you are not married,” Lord Seabrook repeated as if he was speaking to himself. “That makes matters rather different from what I had thought and what I calculated we might feel for each other.”
Lolita turned to look at him and he saw there were tears in her eyes.
“Go away! Please go away! You are – frightening me and there is no one to help me now that – Papa and Mama are dead.”
Lord Seabrook rose to his feet.
“Forgive me,” he said. “The last thing I wanted was to upset you. Just go to sleep and forget what I have just suggested.”
He looked down at her thinking that it was impossible for anyone to look so lovely and yet so helpless.
“It has been a complete misunderstanding on my part,” he added quietly. Please forgive me and try to forget it has ever happened.”
Lolita did not answer him and after a moment he turned and walked back towards the door.
He went into the schoolroom and she heard the outer door into the passage close very quietly.
It was then she knew he had left her and felt the tears running down her cheeks.
‘I love him. I love him. But how can I do anything which would shock Mama and Papa if they knew about it?’
She turned round and hid her face in the pillows.
Then almost as if she was being directed by a voice within herself, she climbed out of bed and walked to the cupboard where her case had been put after it had been unpacked by one of the housemaids.
She brought it out and placed it on one of the chairs and then slowly, as if it was an effort, she dressed herself in the clothes she had arrived in – the blue dress and jacket which she had felt was so unobtrusive when she left her stepfather’s house.
She took down her other gowns from the wardrobe and packed them into the case, together with the one she had worn for dinner. It took her a little time to add her brush and comb and her shoes.
At last she was ready and tiptoed to the door which led into the corridor.
She peeped out.
The Master Suite was on the lower floor and no one else would be awake at this hour.
Carrying her case in one hand and her handbag which contained her money in the other, she moved quietly into the corridor.
She considered it would not be safe to go down the side staircase as one of the servants might see her, so instead she walked down to the first floor and to the top of the main staircase.
There were only a few lights burning in the sconces and there was no night-footman on duty in the castle as her stepfather had insisted on having in London.
Silently Lolita walked down the stairs and reached the front door which was not bolted.
As she pulled the door open she found herself face to face with Lord Seabrook.
He was as surprised to see her as she was to see him and for a moment they both stared at each other.
Then in a strange voice which did not sound like his own he asked,
“Where are you going?”
“A-away,” Lolita stammered. “I-I have to go away.”
“Why?”
“B-because I am f-frightened.”
Her words were hardly audible.
“Of me?”
Now she was looking into his eyes and without thinking she told him the truth.
“N-no, but I am frightened of – doing what you have asked me to do.”
For a moment neither of them moved and Lord Seabrook said,
“I swear to you on everything that is Holy I will never ask you to do that again.”
He saw as he spoke Lolita’s expression change and there was a sudden light in her eyes almost as if it was reflected from the stars.
“You are quite safe here,” he continued quietly. “Go back to bed, Lolo, and forget what has happened. It was very wrong of me and I can only apologise to you.”
She did not answer and he was aware that she gave a little sigh as if of relief.
“Go to bed,” he told her again gently. “We will talk about it all tomorrow. Just forgive me for being very stupid and think of Simon.”
She looked at him as if she had not heard correctly what he was saying.
Next he took her case from her and as he did so she turned and ran up the stairs very swiftly without looking back.
By the time he reached the first landing he was aware that she had gone up the other staircase and he heard her bedroom door close.
He carried her case up the stairs and when he reached the top he opened the door of her bedroom and placed it inside.
He closed the door again and walked slowly back the way he had come.
He had no idea that Lolita was standing just inside the door listening to his footsteps fading away.
She was wondering frantically if she should go after him.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Lolita was asleep when the maid called her.
After she had drawn back the curtains, the maid came towards the bed just as Lolita opened her eyes.
“It’s nearly eight o’clock, ma’am, but there’s no need to hurry. His Lordship’s said he’d like you and Master Simon to come to the stables at half-past-eight.”
Lolita was surprised, but she did not say anything to the maid. Instead she walked through the schoolroom into Simon’s room to see if he was awake.
He was sitting up in bed playing with some toy soldiers he had found in the fort which had once been his father’s.
“Your uncle wants you to ride with him at half-past eight,” Lolita told him.
“Yes, I know and I’m going to show him how I can ride so that he’ll give me a bigger horse, though I still love my pony.”
“I think you would be wise to stay with your pony, because he is beginning to do exactly what you want him to do and I think he loves you too.”
Simon considered this for a moment with his head on one side.
“Do you think my pony loves me as much as Bracken does?”
“I’m sure of it, and remember it’s always wise to stay with the animals and people you love.”
As if she could not help herself she bent down and kissed Simon, who did not seem surprised and put his arms round her neck.
“I love you, Lolo,” he said.
“And I love you too, Simon.”
She returned to her room.
She could not imagine how last night she had been thinking only of Lord Seabrook and not of Simon when she had started to run away and she realised now that she would have been desperately ashamed of herself for deserting him.
But at the same time she loved Lord Seabrook and it would be extremely difficult to be with him every day without his becoming aware that she loved him.
‘He must never know,’ she thought.
She remembered how he had turned away from Lady Cressington in disgust.
‘I could not bear him to feel like that about me,’ she told herself as she dressed.
When she and Simon reached the stables they
found Lord Seabrook waiting for them.
Lolita could not help her heart turning several somersaults, nor could she prevent the light shining in her eyes that had not been there before.
His Lordship had chosen a new horse for her and it was very spirited and hard to handle, while he himself was mounted on a new stallion which he had bought from the same breeder who had sold him Simon’s pony.
They were both having difficulty with their horses and Lolita realised that it was his way of coping with an uncomfortable moment after the drama of last night.
‘He is so clever,’ she told herself, ‘and very, very intelligent.’
As soon as possible they gave their horses their heads and after a good run they both calmed down a little.
When they reached the end of a long gallop, Lord Seabrook, having arrived first, watched Lolita join him.
The words he wanted to say to her trembled on his lips, but he told himself it was too soon and certainly not the right moment.
“I think we should return to the castle,” he suggested. “You and Simon will be feeling hungry, having to wait so long for your breakfast.”
Simon caught up with them at that moment. He had been riding very well and had gone faster than ever.
“I think, my Lord,” she said, “if we give Simon a start he would really be able to race us and it would mean a great deal to him.”
“And, I think, to you. Am I to let him win?”
“No, of course not,” replied Lolita. “But if it was a close finish it would make him even more enthusiastic than he is now.”
“That is just what we will do.”
Lord Seabrook told Simon the plan of the race and then he sent the groom ahead to wait at what he decided would be the winning post and be ready to declare the winner.
The groom smiled and set off.
Lord Seabrook gave Simon a very good start and a smaller one for Lolita.
“If I beat you,” she said encouragingly, “it will be a miracle.”
“You would hardly want me to give you the race.”
“No certainly not, but I think you are overestimating my skill.”
“That would be impossible!”
He rode away as he spoke and she wondered exactly what he meant. But it was very exciting to be with him and riding such an outstanding horse.